Coping PTSD

 As many of you know from the attack I sustained last year I have ongoing PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome) to deal with/manage. Allot of our soldiers have to deal with this as a result of Traumatic events. But what many don't know it can result from a collusion or an attack like in my case. I guess what makes it hang around is depth of physical damage for me. I feel this mental response is a natural and even beneficial state to ones survival, but its no good long term. One of the best ways to manage this condition is to remove the urge to fight or be on guard with certain brain training techniques and coping management. To me crap is an essential by product of life "It's how you deal with it, that counts" 

Diminishing this fight/adrenal trigger has been the biggest challenge for me, for I have to fight daily in isolation for;

• To keep my company (my baby I worked hard to build previously) - even if just - alive so I eventually have something to go back to when I have full movement restoration
• Every time I have to explain why I cant do something or when people asks what happens "I end up reliving and retelling the experience with all the emotional reactions as if its happening again" Thank GOD for Heahphones and baseball caps :DDDDDD
• My injuries prevent me from having a normal life and therefore the sense of being forced to stand still when your a go getter (18 months now - 2 years to go in rehab) makes me angry and want to fight but there is no direct adversary in front of me, that I can take on right here and now
• The Pain and discomfort reminds me constntly of the attack
• The physical scarring reminds me daily of the attack
• With My first (Of what I feel's going to many court cases) wont be until early next year (2 and a half years post collusion/attack) and we are preparing for the first one all the way up to the end of this year
• I actually have to fight daily, so to be delusional and ignore that fact would be to the detriment of my psyche
• My weekly timetable is full of ongoing Medical, Physio, Psyche appointments ongoing, along with Insurance company related and 

  

  ... My Recent Fab Buys

   awyer/court case related (I could be dealing at any point of time 10 medicos in a week - poking prodding questioning and me reliving/retelling) which is time reinforcing the current state of mind which detracts from where one needs or wants to get to
• My injuries and legal responsibilities prevent me from going back home to Spain to see my family and in these past 2 years I've really needed/wanted to see them - but am forced to do it it tough on my own
• Most nights I dream of being where I was before the attack and actually wake up as though I still had my pre-collusion body and abilities not to mention social life
• The missing chunks of muscle I've had all my life that are now gone actually feel as though I'm missing limbs/parts of me
• Mentally I'm an athlete and have been all my life, so my single mindedness in this matter pushes me to fight and push through anything and everything I have to

... So with all that in mind what do I do to contain/treat PTSD and Hypervigillence?? I;

• See a Sports Psyche/Psychotherapist weekly (If you've experienced or someone you know has "A Traumatic event that keeps reliving or interrupts your tacks of thought/pattern" Please see someone and talk about it. PTSD can be managed and resolved, but a good plan and training just as you train your body is essential  By not acknowledging and therefore getting on-top of it now - you'll set yourself up to become reliant on drugs and a lifelong invisible handicap. I actually think there's allot of defence force & even police out there who haven't dealt with issue with the fear of being perceived as emasculated - The very thing you don't want when your going into what is or at times, feels like war)
• I use Help line when I have to (I don't cry but I remind myself its okay every now and again - especially at breaking points once every few months)
• I Diary everything to get it out of my head and onto paper/validation
• Ask for help if I have to (The actual hardest thing I have to do and don't do it often)
• PST Training (Psychological Skills Training used by Pro Athletes) that I'm qualified to teach and even practised before the collusion/attack, Imagery has been the most prevalent practice
• Find and surround yourself with things/people that you find beautiful and connected to
• Keep pulling myself back to the NOW and what's PRIORITY for now and most importantly -
• Switch off at least once a week and for at least a small moment once a day to do something that distracts me enough that I cant think about the ongoing saga (This blog centres on the latter with Artsy things, fab buys that enrich and DIYs that I LOVE!!! - Love my power tools - Will eventually be able to use them again)

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